Eating Less But Still Gaining?

What the hell is up with my body? It's been 2 fucking times I've weighed myself and each time I weigh even higher. I've been eating waaaay less than usual, but even so, I've gone from 51.5 to 51.7 and yesterday 52.0. I just don't understand. Or could it be that my body is metabolizing every single meal I've had (my digestive stract is a bit slow) and I haven't gone to the bathroom in a while. I guess this is the only logical explanation as to why I'm gaining.
I should continue to eat less even if the number on the scale is higher, once I go to the bathroom, I'm sure I'll get rid of it.
Today I'm going to go to school to check my English grade, and that means that I'm finally done with school until January 19th. Yay! I can't wait to go back home and have fun with my family. Plus, lose weight. My mom is still rehearsing every day of the week from 7 to 11pm, so I'll finally have time to excercise again!! Yay!! I haven't excercised here because the Wall of my room is just a huge window, so my aunt and uncle would be able to see me. You know how hard we excercise, so I can't let them see me like that. They'd think I was crazy or something.
I was hoping to weigh 48kg on Saturday, but because of these change of events, I guess even reaching 50 is imposible. Plus, I need to stock up on other weight loss blogs to boost my metabolism. There are tons of things I need to do to prepare for Christmas, and that includes reaching my goal weight. In October, when I was weighing 49.3, my hands were so skinny! You know the part that connects your thumb to your wrist? Well, my skin was sucked in there and my grandma looked at my hand and said, "Ugly, sickly hands." I loved it. Not her comment, but the way my hands looked. I'm still skinny there but not as much as it used to be. I miss that. Anyhow, I just have to get my willpower pants back on and be strict with my goals. There is hardly any food there anyways. That means that binge sessions will be pretty much nonexistent. The downside is that there isn't a scale at home, so I won't know my weight. But I will take pics to check my progress.

 

My aunt just told me yesterday that she's lost 4 pounds in the past week and a half. I asked her what she was doing differently and she just laughed and said, "Cookies. I haven't had cookies or other types of pastries in a while!" Although, I think she'll be gaining that weight back, seeing as my uncle bought a huge box of cookies last night. Last week, my mom was telling me that my grandma had made an unkind remark to my Aunt and how she hadn't lost weight. She (my grandma) was saying that my aunt was still eating as if she was preggo, and that it was time for her to actually lose weight. My grandma is very strict in terms of eating well and having a nice body. She's been saying I look bad 'weight wise' so I guess I look too skinny for her? Anyways, my aunt was all trying not to cry, saying "Well if my husband hasn't said anything..." You know. The common 'if my husband doesn't say anything... 'I guess he's okay with me like this,' or 'I am staying like this until my husband says something.' My grandma said that if she didn't hurry up, my uncle was going to start looking at other girls' bodies and that she (my grandma) didn't want the weight to become an issue in their relationship.
I can somehow agree with my grandma. Not the husband part, but the part of 'its time you lose weight.' My aunt eats 3 huge meals a day, snacks in between. She's been breastfeeding because she Heard that it helps you lose weight, but seems sad to see she doesn't lose any weight. It might be all the shit you eat every day! Hello! It doesn't take a genius to figure that out. Anyways, she's finally cut down to just 2 meals a day, almost no snacks in between. Almost, okay? They bought a packet of doughnuts the night before last, at like... 10pm.
Plus, when I was walking back from school like 2 months ago, I passed this garage place where tons of middle aged chubby ladies had on their loose White shirts and leggings (you could see the cellulite gathered on their thighs) and were dancing Zumba. Ugh! It was saddening (but funny) to watch. At that point I made a promise to myself to never become that kind of middle aged lady, trying to lose weight in order to please my husband... that was probably off with some other woman at that moment.